Prostate Massage for Beginners: What to Buy and How to Start

The prostate is a walnut-sized gland that sits between the bladder and the base of the penis. It can be reached through the rectal wall, about two to three inches inside, and many men find stimulating it intensely pleasurable. For some it produces deeper, longer orgasms.

A purpose-built prostate massager makes it far easier than using fingers or a general anal toy. This guide covers what to buy and how to start comfortably.

What to Buy First

Prostate massagers are curved to reach the gland and have a flared base for safety. Two main styles:

For a first toy, a small vibrating model in body-safe silicone is the easiest. Browse prostate vibrators (from $29.00) or the full prostate massagers range.

• 

  Best for Beginners

  Renegade Apex Rechargeable Silicone Prostate Massager with Remote Control

  Renegade · $68.00

  A small, vibrating massager with a flared base. Vibration helps first-timers find the right spot sooner.

  Check Price at LuxuryToyX
• 

  Best Hands-Free Classic

  Aneros Trident Series MGX Prostate Stimulator

  Aneros · $55.00

  No motor. It moves with your own muscle contractions and rewards patience. A favorite of experienced users.

  Check Price at LuxuryToyX
• 

  Best Lube to Pair

  Swiss Navy Premium Water Base Lubricant

  Swiss Navy · $20.00

  Thick, water-based and safe with silicone. Reapply as often as you need.

  Check Price at LuxuryToyX

Before You Start

• Relax. Tension makes everything harder. Take a warm shower first.
• Empty your bowels if it helps you feel at ease.
• Trim and file nails if you will use fingers.
• Clean the toy with mild soap or a toy cleaner.
• Use plenty of lube. The rectum does not self-lubricate. Choose a thick water-based or hybrid lube. See our lube guide.

How to Start

1. Warm up. Arousal relaxes the muscles. Begin with external touch.
2. Lube the toy and yourself. Reapply as often as you need.
3. Go slowly. Press the tip gently against the opening and breathe out as you insert.
4. Stop if it hurts. Pause, breathe and try again, or stop for the day.
5. Angle toward the front of the body. The prostate is on the belly side of the rectal wall.
6. Hold still at first. Let the muscles adjust, then add gentle movement or vibration.

It may take several sessions before it feels good. Many men feel nothing special the first time, and that is normal.

Safety

• Always use a toy with a flared base. Anything without one can slip inside.
• Never force it. Pain is a signal to stop.
• Do not use numbing products. You need to feel what is happening.
• See a doctor if you have prostate problems, hemorrhoids or rectal pain, or notice bleeding.

With a Partner

Prostate play can be part of partnered sex. A partner can control a remote, or use a toy with you during oral or other play. Talk through comfort and limits first. For couples ideas, see the best couples sex toys.

Cleaning and Care

Wash the toy with warm water and soap or a toy cleaner after each use. Dry it fully. Store it in a clean pouch. Use water-based lube with silicone toys.